Wave hello Say goodbye

There are days that i am surprised by my own strength. Today is not one of those days.
Today amidst packing a lot in insignificant objects I began to cry. I thought I was fine with moving out of my apartment. But when a place has been your home for over a year there are feelings attached. Maybe its not the actual space just all the memories that inhabit it. And leaving the space feels a bit like leaving the memories too.
This year. Well Im not sure if there are words to do this year justice. It has not been what I thought. A million things have changed and a million things have stayed the same. Amidst all this change has been this apartment. There have been a lot of wonderful dinner parties. a lot of laughter. There has been a lot of wine and good conversation. There has been some tears. There has been a lot of dancing. There has been so much. And what is hard about moving out is saying Goodbye to parts of this past year. Parts that I have been holding tightly too. Parts that if I am honest I do not deep in my heart want to let go of or say goodbye to.
. Somewhere I am a bit afraid of what this next season of life will look like. For once I have no plan. All I thought this year would be it was not. It was something better. I think. Im still sorting it all out. But for now it is time to say goodbye.